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Emily

@livingbreadgurl

Followers
6,190
Following
1,246
Media
22
Statuses
503

NY based writer/producer. Fan of shredded cheese and '90s horror. Once went rogue with a camel at the state fair.

Joined September 2020
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Pinned Tweet
@livingbreadgurl
Emily
6 months ago
I'd give my left tit to go to Blockbuster right now, get some Milk Duds and rent Scream
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@livingbreadgurl
Emily
3 hours ago
One of these days I'm gonna just start screaming and never stop lol
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@livingbreadgurl
Emily
8 hours ago
Sometimes I keep smoked meats in my pocket a la Napoleon Dynamite just to add a little OOMPH TO LIFE
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@livingbreadgurl
Emily
13 hours ago
How to get your thriller novel published: Include "girl", "wife", "perfect" or "couple" in the title and steal your plot twist from any number of 18th century Gothic literature
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@livingbreadgurl
Emily
a day ago
I may be mentally unhinged but at least I don't own any Live Laugh Love paraphernalia
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@livingbreadgurl
Emily
a day ago
I only fuck with Pringles People, not Lays Lames
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@livingbreadgurl
Emily
a day ago
I hate when people say "must be nice" in relation to others' success. I worked my ASS off to be where I am today and I'm not sorry you spent the years since high school floundering in a pool of self pity.
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@livingbreadgurl
Emily
a day ago
2021 hobbies include eating a fuckton of garlic and smelling it in my mask all day like a psychopath
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@livingbreadgurl
Emily
2 days ago
Good afternoon to everyone except the heathens who don't put the twist tie back on the bread bag
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@livingbreadgurl
Emily
2 days ago
You think a beaver's favorite song is Dam That River by Alice in Chains?
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@livingbreadgurl
Emily
2 days ago
It's a Sunday in 1999. You have Mario Party on Nintendo 64 and VHS tapes of Are You Afraid of the Dark? episodes. Pizza has been ordered and your friends are on the way. Life will never get any better than this.
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@livingbreadgurl
Emily
3 days ago
It's almost sundress getting caught between butt cheeks season 👌
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@livingbreadgurl
Emily
3 days ago
I haven't seen a single 4/20 joke this month, we're really not ok huh
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@livingbreadgurl
Emily
3 days ago
Everyone's gangster until Baby One More Time comes on
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@livingbreadgurl
Emily
4 days ago
God is a woman and her name is Alanis Morissette
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@livingbreadgurl
Emily
4 days ago
The people who think the Covid vaccine is going to implant a tracking device are the same people who think the stripper has a crush on them
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@livingbreadgurl
Emily
4 days ago
Self care is drawing a smiley face on your food with the condiment of your choosing
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@livingbreadgurl
Emily
5 days ago
Being vaccinated does NOT mean you can shack up with a beast in a castle in the woods, take hallucinogens and imagine his Pier One candle is feeding you delicious grey goo
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@livingbreadgurl
Emily
5 days ago
Don't forget to drink water and mind your fucking business today
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