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Joel Postman Profile
Joel Postman

@jpostman

Followers
18,830
Following
19,152
Media
2,878
Statuses
83,705

You are way cooler than you imagine you are. Racism is a kind of heart disease.

Aptos, CA
Joined June 2007
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
Pinned Tweet
@jpostman
Joel Postman
7 days ago
Guess what I got you for Christmas. An extended warranty for your car! I’m serious! They’ll be calling you soon.
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@jpostman
Joel Postman
an hour ago
Posting this for band books week.
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@jpostman
Joel Postman
4 hours ago
Here’s the thing. I don’t care about the Crumbleys. Not at all.
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@jpostman
Joel Postman
13 hours ago
In many countries this would be an exhibit in a criminal trial.
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@jpostman
Joel Postman
13 hours ago
Doctor: You have a repetitive stress injury. Is there something you do often, every day, with your hand? Me: I delete hundreds of failed tweets.
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@jpostman
Joel Postman
13 hours ago
Whatever idiot painted this totally forgot about Sir Topham Hatt.
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@jpostman
Joel Postman
13 hours ago
Now let’s watch as he performs a very difficult triple reverse self own.
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@jpostman
Joel Postman
13 hours ago
Some people think “No dms” is an abbreviation for Nostradamus.
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@jpostman
Joel Postman
14 hours ago
Dr. Oz is proof that if you can fool millions of people in one profession you can do it in another.
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Joel Postman Retweeted
@cherokee_autumn
❄🌬Shay🌬❄
2 days ago
I promise this is the most hilarious thread and you'll never regret the few minutes it takes to read these comments. Fucking PRICELESS. 1.
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Joel Postman Retweeted
@Scaramucci
Anthony Scaramucci
17 hours ago
If you are running against this a-shole please contact me I will give you dough.
@RepThomasMassie
Thomas Massie
a day ago
Merry Christmas! 🎄 ps. Santa, please bring ammo. 🎁
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@jpostman
Joel Postman
16 hours ago
Have you ever tried drawing a line in the sand? It’s barely visible and disappears almost immediately.
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@jpostman
Joel Postman
16 hours ago
We’re going down tomorrow to get our holiday picture taken and I’m wondering if we need to bring our own guns.
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@jpostman
Joel Postman
17 hours ago
The enemy within. The threat is not at our borders. It is in the heart of our country.
@AndreaMcCarren
Andrea McCarren
a day ago
A beautiful night at the Lincoln Memorial interrupted by demonstrators chanting “reclaim America.“ The crowd gave them the finger and exchanged profanities.
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Joel Postman Retweeted
@ImSpeaking13
Kate 🤍🇺🇸
19 hours ago
If you haven’t watched this speech by Michigan state Senator Mallory McMorrow on school shootings & gun violence, you’re welcome.
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@jpostman
Joel Postman
17 hours ago
All these people sitting around their Christmas trees with guns I don’t think Santa’s going to make it back to the North Pole this year.
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Joel Postman Retweeted
@dontlickchalk
Dubz 🐝
a day ago
This is what an ER room looks like after doctors try to save the life of a teenager who was shot. No. The kid did not make it.
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@jpostman
Joel Postman
17 hours ago
The perfect stocking stuffer. A lump of coal #NFT
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@jpostman
Joel Postman
23 hours ago
New hairstyle at CNN called the Cuomover.
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